I'm starting to wonder if it's the city that makes me hate myself. If maybe if I lived somewhere quieter where the dating game wasn't so vicious and the music scene wasn't so competitive, maybe I'd let go. I had a good day today, I just had a hard time when all the women in my life intersected at the point of my concert. If only Julia had come. Would have been just been the best. I kept leaving the bar to go stand somewhere else by myself and not interact with another human. After five minutes I'd feel guilty thinking I'd left five friends from separate walks of life to fend for themselves. Stupid of me to be surprised when I returned and everyone was laughing and dancing together. Stupid me.