Aside from dreaming that Chuck cast a spell on the Empire State Building that made the whole thing glow inside a black and yellow prism, I also dreamed that Ben was in bad shape, crying on his couch. He sounded like he did on the phone when his mom was in the hospital for hip surgery.

I had a cry in therapy today. A real manly, suppressed one, but still. I was describing the feeling of leaving Boston for Brooklyn last week and likened it to going away to college, when Patrick, Josh, Joe, Patrick, Kelly, Julia, Tord, Chuck, and Ben all crowded around me in my driveway to send me off. I made it around the circle entirely and finally to Patrick, the person I knew least, and just started sobbing into his shoulder.

I said that this was the same as when I said goodbye to Chuck last week. We talked about me not wanting to go back, and how he felt the same thing going back to his workshop in the sticks outside Boston. I looked around the room for a minute and just said "I just feel like I don't want to be anywhere sometimes," and thought of how sad he's been in the past couple years, and he just kind of held his arms open and didn't say anything and hugged me and I teared up and now I'm starting it all again going to bed now goodnight.